Communication is an art, expression of thoughts and ideas but not necessarily always verbal, though it does cover a huge part of one’s day to day activities.
But we all tend to look at it in terms of fluent articulation, quick and spontaneous responses, improved vocabulary etc… But we fail to notice that a good communicator has to be a good listener and not mere voluble speaker.
How many times have we approached a conversation with a preconceived notion about the other ?; our day to day conversations with people we know and we see often, from our house maids, to Auto wala’s and to co-workers and even sometimes our friends and family. We have some assumptions, prejudices and notions ingrained in our mind based on status, education, culture etc.. and it does influence a conversation.
One of my powerful lessons from the past few months is the importance of acknowledging these assumptions.
“Often the greatest barriers to conversation are the assumptions, judgements and barriers of the participants themselves.”
Recognizing and spotting my assumptions and making a note before i start a conversation does help me. This understanding not only makes me more conscious to ‘listen’, but listen to how I am listening.
I am in the process of learning to suspend my judgements to understand the other better and my role effectively.
It seems like people too often don’t listen because they are just waiting for their turn to speak again. At least that is my opinion.